Matters of the tv..

There is a thin line between compromising and sacrificing when it comes to relationships. You often have to choose between giving into something you really have no desire to do or putting a foot down and forcing your partner to suffer on your behalf. Often these topics revolve around religion, money, even what temperature to leave the thermostat on. All of these things can cause contention and resentment in a relationship.

In my house, we often bicker over something much more important then all of that. The battle lies in who has control over the living room television. It is not just the remote but the entire TV. You can either enjoy the bounty of a wonderful LCD television in high def or be sequestered to the master bedroom where you squint to see the picture 15 feet away from you. Inevitably falling asleep because you are after all laying in the bed at one in the afternoon.

In the past I would walk through the living room on the way to my sequestered quarters wondering why my boyfriend is watching the same infomercial yet again. I later found out that it wasn't an infomercial but a show called Ship Shape. How low budget is this show? I thought the guy was selling boat cleaner. Why is he watching this? We don't own a boat..we rarely go on boats..As I pass by, I tend to shout "not this guy again"!! as I walk to the bedroom, nap time yet again...

On occasion I can be convinced to watch a show I would never willingly put on. A great example of this is Dirty Jobs. If you have never caught the show, the host Mike Rowe, an extremely rugged, handsome man (you know I needed some eye candy to make this worthwhile) attempts a day in the life of people who do the dirtiest jobs around. Cleaning porto-potties, scraping rust off of bridges, inspecting sewers and working on pig farms are just some of the crazy tasks he sets out to try. I give Mike Rowe a lot of credit for embracing such horrid jobs and even more kudos to the people who actually do it on a daily basis. When I have a particularly stressful day at work I often think about the bullshit I encounter and it's nice to know at least I am not cleaning the actual thing.

Men would like us to believe that they don't watch reality television. What they seem to forget is that although they are not watching American Idol, Dancing with the Stars or The Bachelorette, they are watching their own version of reality TV when they put on Deadliest Catch, Ice Road Truckers and Survivorman.

On Deadliest Catch we watch groups of men venture into the barren sea to catch King and Snow Crab hoping to bring home the big bucks. They often face 50 foot waves, hauling and lifting pots, on very little sleep. On a particularly rainy day I was roped into a Deadliest Catch marathon and although no one got a rose at the end, it was highly entertaining. You can't help but love the men on the show and get involved in the personal stories of each of them. I now have vast knowledge of crab and a huge fear of the barren sea. Who wouldn't be scared of the ocean after hearing the words barren sea 62 times?

I would rather watch my television shows solo. If I watch The Bachelorette or True Blood in the company of others I am not allowed to mutter how hot a particular male character is or shout at the TV when someone does something I would deem foolish. In front of others these actions would look bizarre. When I am alone the only person witnessing this madness is the ceramic cat that I have in the corner and he isn't telling anyone.

In a recent bonding experience with my boyfriend I sat to watch a few episodes of Man vs. Food and Man vs. Wild. First off, what is with the titles of these programs? Is every show a pissing contest? I am going to produce a show and call it Man vs. Penis. Something tells me this is the first time the man wouldn't win. Man vs.Food is a show I can embrace. I love men. I love food. How can it go wrong? It did go very wrong when I watched the host eat tons of hot chili peppers in record breaking time. Why would someone willingly participate in such an act? I asked my boyfriend this very question and he responded that a man won't turn down a dare. Oh really?... I dared him to buy me a new outfit, the shopping bags have yet to arrive... The coolest part of the show is seeing all the different food concoctions that would never cross my mind.

This blog would not be complete without mentioning a situation that recently occurred while watching Man vs Wild. I didn't mind watching this show because I thought we would benefit from learning what to do if a disaster was to occur. I even got my boyfriend a flint stick that would help start a fire in the event of an emergency. After he practiced setting some plastic cups ablaze it now sits on top of his dresser. Lots of good it will do sitting there and I am going to
be royally pissed if we encounter a need for fire and that flint stick is no where to be found.

In a recent Man vs. Wild scene, the host Bear Grylls tackles a pig. Sensing his end is near the pig starts squealing in agony and I started sobbing that the poor pig was killed for no reason. Bear wasn't actually starving for food so killing the pig was completely unnecessary. I could not stop hearing the echo of squealing in my brain. As my boyfriend stroked my hand telling me that the pig did not suffer the fact was not lost that only two hours prior, I had requested more bacon on my hamburger during dinner.

One thing I have learned from watching all this television whether it is by choice or by force, is that female geared shows tend to focus on love while male versions focus on surviving the work day and bringing home the um...bacon. That in itself speaks volumes on what is important to men vs. women.